What to do when you’re STRESSED OUT!
Sometimes it feels like you can't possibly finish everything you HAVE to get done between now and a certainly deadline.
So you stress out about it.
But that is a waste of your emotional energy, and when you waste emotional energy you are draining the energy that you need to get all of that done.
When I'm tearing around the house shouting "Aaaa! I'm so STRESSED OUT!"
My husband says "So? Stop stressing out!"
We all know it's not that simple, but over time I learned that my stress level WAS something that I could control, to a certain degree.
1) Recognize that stressing out is a waste of your energy
The state of being under stress is not something you can control, but you can control your behaviour: how you respond to it. A stressed out person is frantic, edgy, shouts, runs around trying to do everything at once. A not-stresed out person is calm. Speaks softly. Addresses one problem at a time. Ignores the unimportant. Change your behavior to match the non-stressed (even if you are) and it will help change your mood.
2) Write down everything you need to do before the deadline. Remember: NEED to do - not probably should do.
This is an emergency! I don't have time to write a stupid list!
This is an emergency. This the time when you ABSOLUTELY need to focus only on what is critical.
3) Prioritize.
What are the consequences of letting something slide for an hour? a day? a week? a month, even? If it's not on fire TODAY, put it at the bottom of the list. Remember your BIG ROCKS.
If there are still lots of things that need to get done, do they absolutely have to get done BY YOU? Are there things you can take care of by phone or online? Can you get your friend, husband, or coworker to take one or two tasks off your plate? Can you hire a task out instead of doing it yourself?
Be RUTHLESS with your list. Focus. Survive.
4) Work from the top of the list down.
Ignore everything that can be ignored, starting with everything electronic. If it isn't a call you are expecting, related to the urgent tasks at hand, let it go to voicemail. Answer them in batches after lunch or at the end of the day. Politely tell people that you're dealing with a crisis and would prefer if you could talk to them later.
Bail out of meetings, or ask whether they can be moved.
Keep at problem #1 like a dog on a bone until you can cleanly scratch it off the list. Then work diligently on the next.
Remember that stress is a response, not a mandatory state of being when you're busy.
There's no use stressing out over what you need to do. Just calm down and do it.
5 Ways to Fight the Blahs
We all fall prey to 'the blahs' sometimes. You know how it is:
You're not sick, you're wide awake (usually the middle of the afternoon), but you're bored and unable to get motivated to do much of ANYTHING. There's things that you should do, could do, might do, but you can't even get into procrastinating. You're not necessarily sad or depressed, just... uninspired.
When you're suffering from the blahs, it's easy to get sucked into passive timetraps like TV. You know you should get up. You know you should finish that thing or work on something or call so-and-so back... right after one more episode of Lost.
The blahs are one of the enemies between you and your goals. Here are five ways to fight:
1) Shut down your time traps.
Turn off the TV. Close distractions on your computer. Better yet: step away from the computer altogether for awhile. The first step to getting out is to make the choice to NOT get sucked into something. Even if you're just staring at a wall, that's better than being amused to death.
2) Get a pen and paper.
Put the pen on the paper. Move the pen. It doesn't matter whether you're writing or drawing or just making random marks. Making your hands move is the first step to getting your thoughts flowing. As thoughts flow, energy flows, and soon you will be moving again. (writing not your thing? As an alternative you can bounce a ball against a wall...not recommended for <800sqft apartments)
3) Go outside and explore. (ON FOOT)
Often I find that the blahs are a result of cabin fever. Find an excuse and a destination - it can be anywhere as long as it's farther than to the corner coffee shop and back. Stretch your eyes (focus on things at a distance), take the time to look and examine your surroundings. Investigate shops you've never taken the time to enter before. Take a bus somewhere random (the same bus will always be able to take you back).
Find somewhere new. It's stimulating, and a sure cure for the blahs... as long as you can get yourself motivated enough to get out the door!
4) Go see a friend, or just give them a call.
Is it too cold or rainy to get motivated to go outside? Seek stimulation from other people - just NOT on the internet!! The computer is a timetrap. If you can't get through, call a parent or grandparent. Trust me - they ALWAYS want to talk.
5) Don't fight it.
Sometimes the blahs are a sign of creative burnout. If you're an introvert, you may just need some alone time. Instead of forcing yourself back to the grindstone, take some time to creatively recharge. Get inspired - read or re-read an interesting book, lay back and listen to an audiobook or your favourite album.
Sometimes we just need a BREAK.
If you choose option 5, think of it as a sick day for your brain. You're proactively electing to lose one day to the blahs instead of a week to lackluster creativity. If you're in day 2 or 3 of the blahs, get off your butt and try some of those earlier tips!!
The blahs are no fun, get inspired and go kick some ass!
Introvert or Extravert? Does your working style suit your type?
INTROVERSION versus EXTRAVERSION
You have probably heard these terms before. In case you haven't, whether you are an introvert or an extravert determines how you react to interactions with other people.
Introversion or Extraversion is a fundamental facet of your personality that can't be changed. This is a continuum, and every person falls somewhere on the spectrum - to be highly introverted is to be hardly extraverted - you can't be both.
Before we continue, I'd like to dispel some myths about this personality trait:
- Introversion/Extraversion is NOT a measure of how many friends you have
- It has nothing to do with shyness or social skills
- Neither is good or bad, both have advantages or disadvantages
Knowing whether you're an introvert or extravert is a key component to ENERGY MANAGEMENT, as will become clear.
INTROVERTS: "predominantly concerned with and interested in one's own mental life"
An INTROVERT is content to be alone, and finds dealing with other people draining. They don't necessarily want to be alone ALL the time, but if an introvert doesn't have enough 'alone time', they will feel overwhelmed.
- Introverts tend to be more reserved, and keep a small circle of intimate friends.
- Introverts are not necessarily shy but may prefer activities that they are alone for (reading, art, working on something by themselves)
- Introverts don't tend to enjoy small talk, but enjoy deeper one-on-one conversations with those they already know
- Typical introvert jobs: artist, writer, engineer, composer, and inventor
EXTRAVERTS - "obtain gratificiation from what is outside the self"
An EXTRAVERT feels invigorated when around other people, and finds being alone draining. They love meeting new people. Extraverts feel that they have failed if they haven't met every single person at a party.
- Extraverts prefer group activities
- They tend to think out loud, "talk things through" to come to their conclusions
- Typical extravert jobs: Politics, teaching, sales, managing, brokering, and acting
If neither of these brief descriptions sound like a dead ringer for you, you might fall somewhere closer to the middle of the spectrum, or you may be an ambivert:
AMBIVERTS - People who exhibit tendencies from both groups. Ambiverts are comfortable with groups and also enjoy alone time. They don't find people or solitude particularly draining.
If you think you are an ambivert, I recommend that you find and take a quiz online, as it's not a typical result. (I've only ever met one that I know of!) Most will be at least slightly introverted or extraverted, and it is a useful thing to know.
Here is a test you can take. it's kind of long and ads-y, but it seems safe and it doesn't force you to register.
http://www.queendom.com/tests/access_page/index.htm?idRegTest=697
KNOW YOUR SIDE
I must stress that neither trait is good or bad, but it's important that you know where you fall on the continuum, so you can diagnose when problems getting things done may be attributed to this particular personality trait. If an introvert feels drained, they might need alone time. If a extravert feels drained, they might need to go out to meet some new people. The cure for one is the poison for the other.
Once you know your side, it's important to learn how to take advantage of its strengths and compensate for its shortcomings. Both sides have advantages to success: introverts are comfortable with the laser focus needed to finish amazing things. Extraverts can easily form the important connections that get them where they need to go. Remember, you can't change your type, but you can teach yourself to act outside it.
Are you trying to force yourself to do something you're not naturally inclined to do?
Are you an extravert and trying to succeed in a traditionally introverted role, like writing? You may be struggling because writing demands that you be alone for significant periods of time, which you find draining. Similarly, an introvert will struggle in roles where a lot of personal interaction and social manipulation is required, like sales or politics. You can't help it if your passions don't match your type (not all brilliant writers are introverts - hardly!), sometimes finding the path to success is as simple as changing the way you work.
An extravert writer might find a writing group invigorating. They may 'write' by speaking in an animated session with their co-author, or seeking out dozens of interviews. Working in the company of others (like in a studio) may be another way to compensate, but it might also end up being distracting. You'll get much closer to your goals when you're not forcing yourself to 'thrive in solitude'... which is difficult for extraverts. Similarly, an introvert salesman might do better writing letters instead of going door-to-door!
Recognize what charges you and what drains you
The introvert who has been dragged to seventeen parties this month might feel completely exahusted... the extravert partner can't figure out why! Once you know the cause, the cure is easy.
Recognize it in others
If you need a decision from someone, it's useful to try and guess whether they are an introvert or an extravert. An introvert might come to a decision more quickly if you would just stop talking to them and let them think for a moment - they find conversation draining. They might respond better if you put the request in writing. An extravert will require that you phone them, or help them 'talk the decision through'. It's especially important to recognize this personality trait in your closest friends and partners.
Introvert or Extravert: you may not be able to change who you are, but once you know it and own it, you'll be able to use your trait to your advantage!
Sleep Hygiene
This blog is about training your brain to be as productive and creative it can be, so you can find your way to happiness every day. What on earth does that have to do with sleeping?
We all know how we feel when we've had a good night's sleep: we are thrilled to greet the day, ideas come easily and we can happily get things done. We're also all familiar with the opposite - those days when you get out of the wrong side of the bed- we're plagued with pessimisim, procrastination, and an inability to concentrate. If anything manages to get done, it feels like pulling teeth, and the whole day is brought down as a result.
If you feel like most of your days are the second type, you might have a problem with Sleep Hygiene. Remember - just because you fell unconcious during the night doesn't necessarily mean you got eight solid hours of good quality sleep. In this post I'll give you some tips to whip your sleep habits into shape, and with some discipline and practice, you'll have more sunny, productive days in your future!
Know your Energy Cycle – Maximize your Productivity!
We all have ups and downs in our day, times when we're really alert and active and other times when we're really sleepy and drained. But are you working WITH your ups and downs or AGAINST them? A good way to tell is to map out your own stress/energy cycle.
Below is a sketch of my Stress/Energy cycle. Now, I must emphasize, in big fat capital letters: THIS IS - ANGELA'S - STRESS/ENERGY CYCLE - I'm using it as an example, but you need to build your own!
My Creative Energy and Stress Throughout the Day
Energy Management: Intro
Nanaimo, BC