Reader Questions II
How do manage to find times of focusing for all of the comic, EnergyWise, Trevor and general life?
How do you decide what will take priority over what?
How do you manage the general information overload from e-mail, social media and other sources on and off the internet?
It's not a common arrangement but for us it makes the most sense.)Are there any business practices you notice that are uniquely a product of the Canadian culture?
If you want to improve your abilities with a hobby (say drawing or writing), but time is precious and hard to come by, what's the best way to go about it? Is it better to spend your "spare" time on practicing by oneself? Should you spend more of if interacting with other people who are already successful at it?
(continuing with the question) How do you stay motivated when those around you are already expert at it?
Reader Questions I
Got totally overwhelmed by the end of the year there, but I'm back with a vengeance. To get myself rolling once more here at Mind Management, I asked my readers for their Time Management questions...
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How essential do you think a routine is to making sure your time is managed effectively? I work in shifts from 16- 39 hours a week. I don't do the same days or times week to week so I find really hard to split my time between work, studying, social and hobbies. Any suggestions?
I've definitely been giving a lot more thought to habit and routine this year, but University was definitely more of a "shift" style arrangement with meettings and projects to manage. It's not easy! The human mind seems to thrive on habit and ritual. It takes us time to switch gears and settle into a task - like studying, or doing chores. But it's not impossible!
Here are some things you can try:
* Think of your day in one-hour chunks rather than blocks of "work" and "not work". When you're off work, use a timer to start a block and keep yourself focused (More on that: http://www.angelamay.ca/index.php/2010/01/count-up-timer ). You might need to limit your hobby to an hour a day in order to keep everything in balance but trust me - you can get a lot done in one hour if you focus!
- Keep an active list of *everything* you need to get done - for work, chores, hobby, social... everything on the same list!! When you have a spare five minutes and/or you just don't know what to tackle next, look down the list. Can you squeeze in fifteen minutes of class reading before your next lecture? Can you text a friend and schedule a get-together?
- Keep your tasks as mobile as possible. Even though a smartphone is an expense, it's invaluable being able to fire off a quick email while waiting for the bus, or modifying my grocery order on your lunch break. If you're waiting for a friend, you can get some good knitting/doodling/brainstorming in during that five minutes - but only if you have the tools at hand.
- Your social life needs to meet you half way. The hardest part of keeping up a social life when you're busy is the time lost getting TO where they are to hang out and then back from it. Friends need to be 'scheduled' just like everything else. It's awkward at first... especially if your friends are the type who just want you to come over and "hang out", but if you have goals to achieve that might not be feasible. Reduce travel as much as possible and consolidate "social time" alongside other things. Can you grab a quick coffee after class? Can you do lunch on your way to the grocery store? Working out? Make that a social thing and do it with a friend. Need to get some new shoes? Make that a social outing. Put a limit on the time you're socializing. It's a total drag only being able to see your friends for an hour or two, but using limits and keeping everything in balance makes sure you get to see them at all!
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How do you pursue a passion in your 'spare time'? I haven't had any 'spare time' since high school.
You haven't had "spare time" since high school, and yet you find yourself on a social network.....? I'm joking of course, I use the words "spare time" almost ironically because even in high school I was loaded up with different obligations and scarcely had time to myself. But your spare time is greater than 0:00 - I guarantee it - and if you think it isn't, that's more a factor of prioritizing your time effectively than 'spare time' not existing.
The biggest secret of time management is that 'spare time' needs to be *made*.
It's possible that your moments of spare time are highly fragmented througout your day, and you can't always do exactly what you want when you have a spare five minutes.
If your passion is, say, figure skating, you're not going to be able to do much towards it when your day job is lifting boxes in a warehouse. It takes a lot of time to get down to the rink, lace up, warm up, skate, cool down and change and get back to whatever you were doing before. But how else can that passion manifest? Can you listen to podcasts about figure skating on your drive to work? Can you read figure skating blogs on your phone during your coffee break? Can you tumblr a figure skating photo in the five minutes before bed?
And when it comes to actually getting down to the rink.... how early can you wake up?
If it really is your passion - really truly - and you still can't find ANY spare time to practice for it, you do need to take a hard look at what IS filling your day. Is figure skating your passion... more than video games? More than being on the PTA? More than the ten minutes you spend waiting for a latte at Starbucks?
Creativity Under The Gun
There's an old saying:
"Pressure makes diamonds"
(My friend has modified this saying:
"... but it also makes garbage more compact.")
The last few weeks have been really scary for me. Uncertainty at work has driven my anxiety into overdrive. To be honest, in that state of mind, it's very difficult to get anything done. When what I'm worried about is so intense, it's almost impossible to keep my brain focused on anything but the most urgent of tasks. My brain keeps cycling back to the big impending problem, which was not something I could do much about!
I'm always driven by action, I need something to DO. Unless I'm DOING SOMETHING about a problem, it's very hard for me to feel better. My brain was constantly circling the problem, hunting for some action, ANY ACTION I could take that would fix the problem.
Eventually the cloud lifted and it looks like I escaped disaster...... for now.
But then I realized:
Hey.... there were some okay ideas in those panic attacks! Maybe I should take some of these actions anyway.
The best ideas I came up with were around the concept of 'Taking Inventory'. I'll be tackling some of these tasks in the upcoming weeks:
Taking Inventory
It's good to do a self-check every once in awhile. It's important to just do your best and keep moving forward, but every once in awhile it's good practice to stop and benchmark yourself. In particular, these are the things I'll be taking inventory of:
- Contacts: Who do I know? Where have those people ended up? What are the up to recently? It's time to brush off the rolodex and start scheduling some coffees
- Ideas: I have a LOT of ideas that I have generated in the past but didn't have time to act on. Now it's reversed. Time pressure has let up a bit, but I'm feeling uninspired. This is the time to data-mine some past inspiration
- Food: As weird as it sounds, lately I've been poking around my cupboards and realizing that I'm either out of one product or way overstocked on another. I can't remember the ingredients I do or do not have, and that's making it tough to "whip up a meal" when I don't have a lot of time. Time to look through my staple foods and figure out what's in abundance and what's lacking.
- Clutter: I've done an OK job reducing clutter in certain areas, but there's still a bit of ways to go. I've lost track of what needs to be sold and what needs to be fixed. I had an idea that I should just gather and put all the for-sale-or-broken things on the kitchen table and keep taking care of them until they're all gone.
Is inducing a panic state a recommended strategy?
NO.
As I mentioned, during this scary time I was not the most productive. This is about getting the good out of the bad. It's during the times of trial that fundamental truths are revealed to us: what matters the most, how we really feel, where allegiances lie and what urgently needs fixing.
So get that done!
20 Networking DON’Ts
You know the old adage about "it's not what you know, it's who you know"?
It's true.
The missing second half of the adage is that you actually have to WORK to get to know more people, and find the right people for your goals.
There are lots of books about how you SHOULD build a network, but I feel like I still haven't mastered the art (and it is an art). However, I cannot underscore the importance of networking enough, so I wanted to summarize what I've learned so far. The best I can come up with is a list of networking DON'Ts. A lot of this list feels like "how to be popular"... but at the end of the day, regrettably, that's what life is. Talent and experience are only part of the equation. If you can't navigate social circles and build a powerful network, you will falter. The good news is that it's MUCH more fun than high school, because you'll be building a network of talented, brilliant and interesting people (not just jocks and cheerleaders )
1. Don't be lame and ditch out of social events.
GO to dinner, GO out for drinks (even if you don't drink). It seems frivolous, but it is in these social settings that true bonds are formed.
2. DON'T be a person other people don't want to be around
- Be positive about yourself and your situation. People can only pity you for so long, at the end of the day the Negative Nancies and Debbie Downers stop getting invited to the parties.
- Be outgoing, as much as you can be (and it CAN be learned!)
- Be funny, if you can, or at least be nice
3. Don't trash talk people, whether they're around you or not.
Word travels, and even if the person that you're with doesn't spread what you've said, they will be wondering what you are saying about THEM when they're not around.
4. Don't gossip.
Loose lips sink ships, and if you're known as a gossip no one will tell you anything truly valuable. It's okay to listen politely, but don't contribute, dig for details, or spread rumours. It can only get you into trouble.
5. Don't make assumptions about people you've never met.
Approach with an open mind and form your own conclusions. It's important to be aware of how others are perceived within a community, but you might be surprised. People CAN change and grow. You might find a valuable ally who was overlooked by the others in your network.
6. Don't assume you are the best in a group and don't have anything to learn.
There is ALWAYS something to learn from ANYONE. LISTEN. You can find expertise and insipration in the most amazing places.
7. Don't be flaky or unreliable.
If you say you're going to be somewhere at sometime, BE THERE. Keep your promises.
8. Don't lie.
If you're trying to join a community, you will be outed eventually. It's tough to live down.
9. Don't be rude (to anyone - especially service sector folk), and don't be a bigot
These traits stick to your reputation like glue.
10. Don't be unstable - flying off the handle at every bump or offhand remark
If people feel like they have to walk on eggshells around you, they will be wary to be open with you or will avoid you entirely. Those with thick skin get told the truth, learn faster and are better for it.
11. Don't bring drama
Check your baggage at the door. Even if the drama relates to the community, it's better to stay out of it.
12. DON'T get completely shitfaced and force others to look after you.
Drinking is fine, especially if you need one or two to help you overcome social anxiety, but KNOW YOUR LIMIT and stay well under it.
13. Don't constantly beg OTHERS to get completely shitfaced, etc.
If they are not into it, they aren't into it. Just leave it be. A quiet evening is far more enlightening than an acid trip.
14. Don't party crash.
It will take time for you to get invited to the right places, shoe-horning yourself in is going to hurt you more than help you.
15. Don't bring a whole entourage to "THE parties"
or, don't spread the word about a party if you weren't supposed to.
You can control your own behavior, but not the behavior of others. In the end, being the one who "let them in" is just as bad as being the bad actor. If you managed to get invited, make sure that the invitation is extended to the others you want to bring, or you won't find yourself invited again. If YOU are part of the "entourage" getting into a party, make a good impression. Don't make anyone regret it.
16. Don't "fangirl/fanboy out" to people.
You may tell them calmly that you like their work or convey your respect and admiration, but try not to get star-struck. The big players are still just people. Related: don't ask for or expect ridiculous favours/name-drops from someone you've met once or twice. Those in higher positions worked very hard to get there. Be humble and respect that. They owe you nothing.
17. Don't be a cheapass.
People will understand if you're on a budget, but if you show up to a party with no booze and drink everyone else's, or start stuffing your bag with the free food, they will remember you and NOT in a good way.
18. Don't sell yourself in casual networking situations.
There are times to sell and there are times not to. If someone asks for your card, give it to them, but don't launch into an elevator pitch upon introduction. It's good to let people know how you fit into the greater context of a network (are you a creator? A supporting businessperson? A friend in an adjacent field?) but don't jam it down their throat.
19. Don't steer the conversation towards being "about you" at every oppportunity.
DO open up and share yourself, but it should be an equal exchange.
20. Don't form a clique.
Some friends will be closer than others, but mix it up. You don't want your whole network to depend on a small handful of relationships.
At the end of the day, remember: networking is about making friends, and you can't fake that. Be a good friend- a genuine, good friend -and good things will follow.
I’m Back with a New Work Flow!
Hello, Internets! Just as promised, I'm baaaaaaaaack!
I honestly missed writing quite a bit! Taking the break was the right decision but I'm very glad to be back. Thank you all for being so supportive of my mini-hiatus.
First things first, I have a confession to make. When I started this blog, I promised that I would share with you how I organized things, and that I would let you know when I discovered that something isn't working. This is one of those times.
At the beginning of the year, I set a new process flow:
- Priorities were identified and SMART Goals were RANKED
- Success Metrics would be TRACKED weekly
- I assigned different goals for every month of the year. In January I would focus on this. In April I would focus on that.
Well, here we are, in July. More than six months of the year have drained by. Don't get me wrong, I have managed to accomplish a few things.
First and foremost: I have a frickin' BOOK (Wasted Talent Book One, currently at the printer). So much of my energy has gone into this, it's not even funny. It was worth it... except that it took way WAY longer than I was hoping it would. Thinking back I don't think I could have worked harder, but it's just depressing when I think of the sum-total of time I spent on this book.
I got frickin' MARRIED. Again, another thing that I am kind of bashing my head against the wall at how long it took. Wayyy too much time, money and energy. But I only had to do it once and it is over now. The day was great and I am so happy to have Trevor and just be married to him. (Should the unthinkable happen to our marriage - I'm just going to elope next time )
I suffered through a FLOOD and a MAJOR RENO. Our kitchen was completely torn apart, walls were ripped out and rotated, floors were redone. I couldn't wash a dish for two months. When you live in less than 800sqft, any little disruption makes a HUGE impact, especially on my poor little control-freak brain. The kitchen reno was happening either way, the flood just expanded the work-zone farther than we were hoping. But it's done! Done done done! The apartment is vastly improved.
These three major things took up way more time and energy than I was predicting, and as a result all of my "timelines" are thrown out the window. I also completely failed on the weekly tracking thing. I have a few things that were tracked automatically, like traffic, and other things that I've been tracking week-to-week, like chores and whether I worked out, but I haven't saved those records. I initially built a Google Doc to track it, but I just don't spend that much time on Google Docs.
When I evaluate my current standing compared to the goals I set at the beginning of the year, it's depresing. But I decided, rather than being depressed about how "behind" I am on everything, I'll develop a new way of doing things.
NEW PROCESS
- Still using ranked priorities and SMART goals
- Not going to obsess over tracking metrics. I am still looking for a way to track metrics that will fit suitably in my life, but for now I'd rather spend my precious energy DOING rather than TRACKING.
Here is the biggest shift:
- All of my goals are now divided into "habits" and "projects"
HABITS are something that need to be done repeatedly: every day, week or month (like working out, or writing a blog post, or getting dressed nicely.) Success is determined by how OFTEN and CONSISTENTLY you do it.
PROJECTS have a defined beginning, middle and end. Success is determined by whether it's done or not (1/0).
It's a pretty clear division, but when I set my goals at the beginning of the year, habits and projects were all mashed together with varying priorities.
HERE IS THE NEW RULE
- You can only build (or break) one new habit at a time.
- You can only tackle one project at a time, and you need to focus on it until it is DONE.
I'm not going to dwell so much on the "when". (such as, in April I will learn to ride my bike to work (I didn't) or I will finish my book by March (yeah, whoops.)) The "When" will always be "as soon as possible". When you finish one habit or project, you move onto the next most important one. Immediately. The order and priority is what concerns me.
So that's that.
I'm very excited by the new set of goals I have to tackle now that these huuuuge major ones are out of the way, and I'm glad to start posting again.
I'll let you know how this goes.
See you in July
I started this blog last August for several reasons.
First because I wanted a place where I could project a more professional face to the internet. Next because I love writing, and I wanted to try my hand at this blogging thing. And lastly, because I wanted a way to answer everyone who asked me "how do you do all this?". I wanted to chronicle this crazy journey and discover new things for myself.
So far, I've written a lot of posts that I'm really proud of, and I've heard some great feedback from you out there. I'm so grateful, and I've had a lot of fun so far.
If there's one thing that I preach at this blog, it's prioritizing. Know your goals, prioritize, and get it done.
This is one of those moments where I have to prioritize.
May 10th marks the two-month countdown to my wedding day. I have a lot to accomplish between now and then. I am really not sure how this is going to go down, but I get the feeling that I need to brace for a lot of frantic activity.
Therefore, I'm scaling back my internet life for the next two months, and Mind Management falls under that category. I'll probably still find moments to clatter away at the keyboard, and I have LOTS of ideas that you can look forward to when I get back in July.
Here's a preview:
- A "Know Thyself" series, where I will help you discover what makes YOU tick, and how to use that to your advantage.
- Techniques to manage stressful situations and anxiety
- Networking Do's and Don'ts
- Getting more BANG for your effort BUCK
- A "Creativity Cycle" series, where I describe each phase of the cylce and introduce techniques to keep yourself moving forward at every stage
I'd love to hear what you think of these ideas, and also other ideas or concepts that you've read here and you'd like me to expand upon.
I'm still working to discover the "voice" of this blog, and I could use something to mull over in the next two months.
In the meantime you will be able to find me on twitter: http://www.twitter.com/angelamelick
And I'm going to do my darndest to keep updating Wasted Talent: http://www.wastedtalent.ca
So, thank you so much for reading, I will see you soon!
Cherish Free Advice
I have come to learn that the best advice in life is
- Free (or easily obtained)
- Short, Clear and Logical
- Easier said than done
What I learned from my “Olympic Experience”
You may have noticed that things have gotten rather quiet around this blog in the last month. I haven't abandoned or forgotten about it! In fact a little thing called the Winter Olympics rolled into my back yard, and I wasn't about to pass up on two full weeks of once-in-a-lifetime opportunities.
I wanted to let you all know what was up, so I thought I'd share with you a bit of what I've learned from my "Olympic Experience". I'm sure hindsight and historical context may change some of my opinions in the future, but right now this is what stands out to me:
Conquer Email! Part 2 of 2
Keepin' it clean
This is the second part of a two-part series on managing that dreaded scourge of your sanity -- email. Part one is here.
Now that you have a clean inbox thanks to part 1, keeping it in this zen-like state is a matter of building good habits.
TURN OFF your email notification.
In Outlook, Tools > Options > Preferences Tab > Email Options > Advanced Email Options > "When New Items Arrive in My Inbox" - Uncheck EVERYTHING except maybe (maybe!!) the "Show an Envelope Icon in the notification area". The key is: No popups, no sounds. They are a distraction.
IF POSSIBLE, funnel ALL your emails to ONE inbox. Some of us have multiple inboxes, but it's best to just keep it all in the same place. It all has to be filtered and acted upon by YOU, after all!
Set only a few times per day to process email.
I like to do it in the morning, after lunch, and before the end of the day. These are the ONLY times of the day that you will check and process email. Email is a time trap, if you're checking your inbox, it should only be to flag, folderfy and delete - not answering.
During your process times, open your inbox and repeat the prioritizing process laid out in part 1: Open every email, do a quick scan, and process it in one of three ways:
1 - Delete (If you're deleting emails repeatedly, you should try to unsubscribe.)
2 - Read quickly and drag to a folder (no action required on your part)
3 - Read quickly then flag for action (if further consideration or reading is required, that's an action - flag it).
If it requires an immediate reply, or if the action or response can be taken care of very quickly, just take care of it, turn off the flag and drag it to the folder. If it's less urgent, or more work needs to be done, either just leave it flagged and see if you can answer it at one of your later passes of the day, or add the action required to your action list. If you need to save the email for reference, either flag the email a different colour and drag to a folder or PRINT TO PDF and manage it with your other files. The goal is to have your inbox clear of flagged emails by the end of the day! (Which is a nice goal... but if you can see all your email at once without scrolling, you're doing pretty good
Caveat Emptor
Angela May, Vancouver, BC
- I was born under the Cancer sign (Moody, Maternal, Stubborn), and in the Year of the Rat (Imaginative but Critical).
- I am moderately high-Mach (pragmatic), and have a high Need for Achievement (N.Ach - McClelland's Theory of Needs).
- I am INTJ ("Mastermind": Moderately Introverted, Intuitive, Thinking, Judging - Pragmatic contingency planners who love problem solving) .
- I am a kinesthetic learner (learn by doing).
- I'm flexatarian (a non-strict vegetarian) .
- I'm assertive and honest (sometimes too much so).
- I'm often cranky and I like to rant, but I'm trying to learn to be nicer to people.
- I find it much easier to speak in front of a crowd of 200 strangers than quietly with 3 new aquaintances.
- I struggle with mild depression and stress, but I've developed many strategies that help me cope with both.
- I have Circadian Rhythm Disorder (I am nocturnal) but I have strategies to deal with that, too.